Parenting 101

Isn't it interesting how much some think they know about parenting even before they have kids? I know I used to have great ideas about parenting. If I heard a screaming toddler in the grocery store, I said to myself, "If that were my kid, I would..." and then come up with some solutions that would shape that kid right up. When I saw a baby with a pacifier, I thought how silly that was. Your baby doesn't need a pacifier if you simply make sure all his needs are met. If he's crying, find out why and fix the problem. Easy. And, of course, I would never be guilty of saying "Because I said so." I would calmly and logically explain the reason to the child who would immediately understand.

One day, some years later, I heard a screaming child in the grocery store. It turned out this particular child was sitting in my grocery cart. But nothing I did stopped the crying. What had happened to all those great ideas? Some I had already used, but they hadn't worked. The others--well, I was afraid that if I tried them, I would be arrested. The pacifier, which I had packed in the diaper bag also wasn't working. There was nothing left to do but cut the shopping trip short and go home.

As the kids got older, there were also many times I answered the question "Why?" with "Because I said so!" What had happened? Why wasn't I following my own great advice? In a word, REALITY.

Reality had taught me that even the most disciplined child gets bored after being in a grocery cart for an hour and sometimes nothing can stop the crying but heading home. I had also figured out that there are some babies who have all their needs met perfectly well, but still won't stop crying. In those cases, a pacifier may help. Sometimes. Reality had also told me that there are times when a child needs to obey without question and the old "Because I said so" standby is the best thing. If necessary, the logical reasoning process can follow later. After all, if your house was burning and you told your child to get out, you wouldn't answer their "Why" with logical reasoning.

So now, when I hear a crying child at the store, I sympathize with the poor mother (or father) instead of judging them. I also wonder if they would like a pacifier. For the child, I mean.

The Adventure of Costco Shopping

The other day I made my monthly trip to Costco. If you have ever shopped at Costco (or any other warehouse-type store) you know how much fun it can be.

First of all, parking. I have never been to Costco when it is not busy, so finding parking is always a challenge. But I can usually find a spot within sight of the front door. That doesn't mean close to the front door, just within sight of it.

Then, I grab a cart, flash my little card at the greeter, and I'm ready to shop. Of course, due to poor planning, I am once again arriving just before lunch time and getting hungry. Fortunately, there are a plethora of free samples available.

I head down the first aisle which now contains chips. A few months ago, it contained toothbrushes. Before that, it was diapers. I guess they like to rearrange things now and then to keep us on our toes.

I soon have a cartload of gigantic packages of random items: peanut butter, chips, candy, bottled water, frozen pizza, and toilet paper. I check my list and make sure I haven't forgotten anything, because if I have, it means walking the equivalent of four city blocks to go back and get it. I have also gotten my fill of free samples: English muffin, meatball, potato chip with dip, and cheesecake for dessert. Who needs lunch?

To the self checkout. Scan the items one by one. Hope that the conveyor belt doesn't get too overloaded. But it does. Rearrange everything and continue. As I scan, a computerized female voice shares each price with everyone standing nearby. How nice of her. Get my total. Swipe my card. Get my receipt.

Now I have to hurry and load it all back into my cart before the person behind me gets their stuff mixed up with mine. Finally, after someone checks my receipt and I'm out the door.

Loading the stuff into my car can be tricky. If the sun is shining, I have to make sure the chocolate items are not on top. Otherwise, the sun shines on them all the way down the highway and melts the chocolate. (I'm serious. That happened once.) So I play Tetris with the groceries trying to get them all in the back of my car in nice neat stacks.

When I finally arrive home, I then have the enjoyable task of lugging everything into the house except for the items that go straight into the chest freezer. Then I rearrange the pantry and the fridge a couple times to make room for all the stuff.

Finally, I'm done! And it was so worth it because I saved...Well, I don't know exactly how much money I saved, but I know I saved some. So it was totally worth it!

Now all I have to do is forget how "fun" it was before I go again next month.